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Episode 452: Epic Rail


Yeah. You never expected to see an actual safety railing in the Star Wars universe, did you? And when we finally do see one, where is it? Keeping people safely away from the edge of one of those apparently bottomless shafts that leads to a reactor core? Stopping people from falling off narrow catwalks that inexplicably span vast chasms for no apparent reason? Around a slippery, water-sloshed platform which offers a drop of hundreds of metres into a merciless, storm-whipped ocean?



Anakin: So, Dookû. It's clear that you're a liar. I wouldn't expect anything less of a Sith Lord.
[SFX]: Whooom!
Count Dookû: Ze Sith are zhust a legend! This is all ze set-up!
[SFX]: Whooom!
Obi-Wan: I hate to say it, but you've lost all credibility, Dookû.
Count Dookû: You fools! You are being manipulated and you cannot even see it!
GM: Dookû Force Pushes you across the chamber and into a railing. Take 2d6 impact damage.
Obi-Wan: Railing?
GM: Yeah, on this mezzanine deck here.
[SFX]: Slam!
Obi-Wan: There are bottomless pits and aerial landing platforms without railings, but a deck two metres above the floor has one?
GM: Well a two-metre fall could actually be dangerous. For example: Take another 1d6.
[SFX]: Splat!
Obi-Wan: Sod, I was already hurt when that lift suddenly reversed direction.
R2-D2: Hey, I was hurt when you left me behind to guard the ships, but you don't hear me moaning about it.
GM: Dookû drops the platform on you, pinning you to the floor. Take another 2d6.
[SFX]: Krunch!
Obi-Wan: I pass into blissful unconsciousness.

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Published: Sunday, 02 January, 2011; 14:36:51 PST.
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