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Episode 35: A River Runs Through It


Some of you may be wondering where this scene came from. The waterfall is actually a deleted scene from the movie, which is available on the DVD release. We can see why it was cut from the film, because: (a) it's totally a cliché, and (b) it's completely ludicrous, as Obi-Wan rightfully protests.

However, it does provide a nice bit of drama at this point in the comic, and it gave us a chance for a few additional gags. So what the heck, we're throwing it in.

But if you ever have your characters floating down a river in a game you're running, for pity's sake, don't throw a waterfall at them.


GM: You're in Theed, the capital of Naboo. It's a beautiful city of monumental architecture, with verdigris roofed stone buildings lining public squares filled with marble statuary.
Obi-Wan: We head to the royal palace.
GM: You're still in your bongo, on the river.
Qui-Gon: So we can still go back to the underwater ruins?
GM: No, there's...
GM: A waterfall! The bongo is drifting towards the edge!
Obi-Wan: How can there possibly be a waterfall? The water level in any connected system has to be the same.
Qui-Gon: Wait, I know this. Bernoulli's principle... no... osmosis! No, capillary action!
GM: You're getting closer...
Obi-Wan: None of those help! The river should drain out the tunnel we came up!
GM: ... To the edge!
Qui-Gon: We power up and dive.
GM: The bongo won't start. You're out of power. It drifts closer and closer.
Jar Jar: Oh nosa! How will wesa exscape?
Qui-Gon: Let me check my character sheet.
Qui-Gon: Ooh! I have 50 feet of carbon nanofilament rope and a magneto-grappling hook.
[SFX]: SPWANG! {Qui-Gon fires}
[SFX]: THOONK! {shot of hook hitting river bank}
Qui-Gon: We climb across to solid ground!
Obi-Wan: Solid geology seems rather rare on this planet.

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Published: Sunday, 25 September, 2011; 02:54:32 PDT.
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